Hands Off

Saturday afternoon - another trip to the park. Going to the park means getting Grant on his bike. Getting Grant on his bike means another lesson in patience for me and another lesson in bike riding for him.

I can't believe it's been over a year since I first wrote about teaching Grant to ride. In that year, we have made incredibly little progress on his bike. At least we hadn't lost anymore of our progress, and for that I am thankful.

But Saturday, we did it. We made progress. I should say, Grant made progress because it's really all on his shoulders at this point. I've made my peace with knowing that it's just going to take a long time and it's got to come with his own desire and on his terms.

For well over a year now, he has insisted that I keep my hand on the bike while he's riding. If I took it off, he would either stop riding or start crying. So every so often I move my hand just off the handle bar so that he knows my hand is there but at the same time he knows I'm not touching it.

On Saturday, though, he let me take my hand off the bike. For almost the whole way to the park and then the whole way home, he was ok with me running along side of him. He let out a few squeals and reached for me a couple of times, but they were just half-hearted attempts. He was ok with it. I could see that he was comfortable on the bike for the first time in a long while.

Oh for the day when he can focus continuously on his riding so that he doesn't veer off the path, the day when I can ride along side of him, the day when we take the training wheels off again, the day when he truly realizes the freedom of riding his bike. Until then, we'll keep riding and learning, together.

am I going to die?

For whatever reason, Owen has had a few stys in his lower eye lid over the years. Usually, they go away with either a hot compress or some ointment. However, for the past few months, what appeared to be a sty got a little too big and we had to get it checked out.

The doc's response - hmmm, I'm not sure what that is, better get it checked by a specialist. Well, that's not what we wanted to hear!

So, a few weeks back we took him to a pediatric ophthalmologist (what a mouthful that is!) to get it checked out. He was fantastic in the office, pretty amazing really. He sat right up in the big chair, put his face in the "eye checking machine" and did everything the doc told him to. The diagnosis? Whew, nothing serious. She said it is a sty that has burst, then another grew on top of it, and maybe even a 3rd time. Unfortunately though, the only way to get rid of it is to cut it out.

Cut? In his eye? And, to top it off, the doc said that we would need 2 strong people who are not afraid of blood to hold him still while she works on his eye.

Umm.. Ok. Hmmm.. Can't wait for that.

Tuesday was the big day. Cut day. We tried our best to prepare him but of course he really had no idea what was in store for him. Staci was very prepared; she had a new stuffed gorilla for him to hold during the procedure and a transformer for after the procedure was done. Once again, he hopped right in the chair and allowed the doc to poke and prod. But then it was time to start.

Staci lay in the reclined chair and wrapped her arms and legs around Owen to hold his body still. I was behind him and in charge of holding his head still.

As soon as the disinfectant drops reached his eyes, it was all over. Tears. Screams. Struggle. And now, time for the sharp instruments. With his head firmly in my hands, the doc inserted a needle in his lower eye lid to numb it. The sight of his eyelid puffing full of liquid was a sight I will never forget.

While he is still screaming, the doc pulls his eyelid back in a tool to hold it in place. She then whips out a small scalpel/knife and starts lancing the sty. It takes a few cuts to completely remove it, but while this is happening, Owen is getting much more concerned. "Will I ever see again?" "Please make her stop!"

"Am I going to die?"

From a 5 year old? We all stopped and looked at him when he popped this line out. Where could he possibly have gotten this fear? This concept? I'm still stunned by the depth of his fear at that moment and the unspoken thoughts that must have been rushing through his head. As the doc applied a bandage over his eye, he saw a little of the blood and became even more concerned about losing his sight. In a manner of just seconds, he went from fighting the bandage to not wanting to take it off. He was so scared that taking it off would cause more pain or would cause a problem with this eye.

As the day went on, he was very comfortable with his bandage. Grant was quite curious about it but did not try to remove it from Owen's face. Finally, Staci was able to remove the bandage at bath time; he finally understood that it was ok to remove it and he was tired enough at that point that he didn't give up a fight.

Fortunately, there have been no complications and there have been no more concerns about death. But what an adventure into the mind of a 5 year old!

old is new

Last week's school quandary had to be solved quickly, and it was. Staci talked to the principal and got her to agree to a choice - either Owen would go to the K/1st grade combo with his existing teacher or he would go to a new K class with a new teacher. However, either option would involve moving from the "late hour" to the "early hour".

Staci also talked to Owen's teacher, to Grant's teacher, as well as a few other adults. Owen's teacher really wanted him to come with her to the new combo class. They have quickly bonded, and it's clear that she is getting through to him. Grant's teacher had worked with her several years ago and recommended that he stay with her. Ultimately, the choice was easy. Since the major pain in this change was really the change in the hour, and since we were going to lose the "late hour" schedule either way, it was purely a "what's best for Owen" question. He likes his teacher and she likes him. He's loving school and he's ready to be challenged by being in a class with 1st graders. So, this past Monday he started his new class and it's gone very smoothly.

As for the schedule change, Staci is making it all work. She drops him off on her way to work - no problem there. However, since he gets out 30 minutes before Staci is off work, the real trick is what happens after school. Going to an after school day care is really expensive and seems senseless for such a short period of time. So, the plan is for me to work from home 1 or 2 days a week and pick him up. The other days, Staci's mom will pick him up and bring him over when Staci gets home - thanks, Grandma!

quick change artists

We're winding up the 4th week of school (!) and it's been amazingly quiet. Cassidy hasn't had any issues starting Jr. High (at least nothing she will admit to) and she's enjoying most of her classes. Grant is well entrenched in 3rd grade and his 3rd year in the same SDC class. Owen is soaking up Kindergarten as if he was parched for knowledge. Besides the big introductions of Jr. High and Kindergarten, our biggest concern was scheduling. They each go to a different school and Grant and Owen's class get out 5 minutes apart. The teachers, however, have been very accommodating and that turned out to be a non-issue. The other scheduling issue was that Kindergarten starts almost 2 hours after Staci goes to work but she had all that worked out as well. We had a great system going!



We got a letter the other day stating that some classes at Owen's school need to be juggled and that one of the K classes would be switched to a K/1st combo class. Hmm... Initially we thought it might be a great thing for Owen since he's doing so well and we initially had concerns that he might be bored in K. However, once we found out that the new class would start in the "early" hour and not hist current "late" hour, we abandoned that. Can't do that, our schedule is perfect!

We got another letter today. Your child has been placed in the new K/1st grade combo class. Ack! Not only was everything working out academically and clock-wise, Staci also had 90 minutes all to herself each day before she had to pick up Owen. In the blink of an eye, we now need to find somewhere for Owen to go for about 60 minutes after school since he gets out before Staci is out of work, and now Staci's "quiet time" has just disappeared . @#)2@)#(*)#((#)((!!!

Oh, and in case this wasn't made perfectly clear in the first letter, this all starts this coming Monday.

Opening Day

Are you ready for some football?!? Ah, opening day - the cheering fans, the shouts from the cheerleaders, the referees' whistles blowing, the grass and mud all over the players. NFL? College? No, it's upward football and today was opening day. Cassidy is playing for the first time, and she's a stud. Unfortunately, there aren't enough girls to field multiple teams so we have to play 4 on 4 - maybe next year!

I love this action shot - the 2 girls on defense are about to pounce on Cassidy (with the ball). Look at her go!






This shot is from the last play of the game. Cassidy caught a pass in a crowd and then took off like a flash. Following this play, they lined up for a 2 pt conversion; she lined up at QB and threw a completion in the back of the end zone!

Who knows, maybe she'll be the Brandy Chastain of girls football and she'll be playing pro someday. :)

don't read this post

No, seriously. It's my own fault. I stayed up a little too late reading blogs and found this guy who has been recording TV since 1976! Don't click on the link! Well, not if you value your spare time anyway. If you go there, you will not leave your seat for a long time. I'm just warning you. Fascinating. Hilarious. Uncanny.

Hmm.. I'm probably not getting any sleep tonight. Somebody help me!

the weekend in pictures

In the middle of all that swimming this past weekend, Owen took a break to describe the day in his own "words".

Time to get our swimming suits on!

I'm going to push you in the pool, Dad!

Splash!

Dad is throwing me in the water!

Wow, I was that was a huge throw! I made a big splash!

Time to get out of the pool and eat some popsicles!

Here is my popsicle.

Ok, time to go back in the house.








The End.

Pool School

So this is what post #100 feels like. This number has been preventing me from posting for several days; I wanted #100 to be cool, special, unique but I couldn't/wouldn't make the time for it. Yeesh - what a goof I am. I started this blog to write about Grant's progress so it is only fitting that #100 focus on Grant.

It's been roasting here for the past week - in the triple digits all of last week so we've practically been living in the pool. I never cease to be amazed at how 'at home' Grant is in the pool. When he is in the water, it's as if the world around him settles down and he can see and feel his environment in such a calming way.

The 'overload signs' are non-existent in the pool - the pressure clapping, the fingers behind his ears, the rote 'babbling' of lines from his favorite shows, the list goes on and on.

The 'calm signs' are a joy to behold - big smiles, eagerness for participating in pool activities together, feeling at ease around other kids, no hitting, laughter. I'm smiling just writing this list.

He often will ask me to go under water with him; it's almost like he's saying 'Come, see my world, Dad'. Under water, life is quiet - very quiet. Any sounds from up above are just muffled vibrations. There are no bright lights - indeed, even sight is muffled. While my 5 senses are being deprived, my proprioceptive sense chimes in with 'all is well' - my body feels wrapped tight with water and nothing is poking, prodding, tickling my skin. We look at each other and laugh before we shoot back to the top for some air.

If only we could bring some part of this into the rest of his daily life. If only he could tell us what is it in the 'outside' world that brings him agitation. Maybe it's time to bring the speech therapists and his teachers over each day and we'll have school in the pool!! Imagine the advancements he would make!