Milestones

I can't believe this is the 3rd week of school already. Mornings are still crazy; we should have it figured out by Memorial day... Cassidy starts school at 7:40, Grant at 7:50 and then I drop Owen off at preschool after that. Does anybody else's school start that early? And here I am reading blogs at 12:30 am. I wonder if that's why it's so hard to wake up in the morning?

The beginning of the school year and beginning the process of chelation have had me thinking about how Grant has grown in all areas since he was 3. Here are some of the major areas that have made such a difference in his/our lives.

• Saying yes/no - I think this came late in his 4th year and I still think it is the single biggest hurdle he's leaped. Prior to this, it was nearly impossible to find out what he needed or what he wanted. What a marvelous experience it was to see (at first his response was in sign language) and then hear a response when we asked him a question or gave him a choice. I believe this skill also quickly allowed other communication skills to flourish as he figured out he could get what he wanted with so much less effort than before.
  
• Unprompted words - For so, so long all of Grant's words were prompted. Although he was beginning to put the sounds together in forms that we could just begin to understand, it was so much work to prompt him. Unprompted words, when they appear, are like finding a $20 bill on the ground - totally unexpected, exciting, and gone in the wink of an eye. He says all of our names now, although saying 'Cassidy' is the most impressive (it's his only 3 syllable word). He has said 'home' to us when we're out somewhere and he's very tired. And, of course, 'Bathroom'.
  
• Putting on a helmet - If Grant is going to ride his bike, he has to wear a helmet. Well, I kept telling myself that anyway. We tried to get his helmet on for 3 years. A couple of times, it got on but it was short lived. For about 18 months, a great friend of ours had us come over and work with Grant while riding a pony. I'll have to post about that experience another time, but of course that required a helmet as well. Yeah right.
  And then, one magic day late last year, he just put it on, buckled the chin strap, and we were off. Oh how I wish he could explain what happened that day and why it is no longer a problem, but it isn't and that's all that counts!
  
• Toilet Training - We are so fortunate that Grant is now fully potty trained and never really had that fascination with poop that so many other kids have. But, oh, those years of training. I truly doubted whether he would ever get it. Time after time, I would clean up the mess. Time after time, we would bring him to the potty. And then, he started picking the toilet icon all by himself. And then he just started going by himself. And then he started cleaning up after himself. And now he washes his hands when he's done. And it never ceases to amaze me.
  
• Dressing himself - How do you teach him that the tag goes in the back? To snap? To zip? To match colors? He picked up these skills pretty quickly, actually. His OT was awesome in getting his fingers to button, zip, and snap. He found the skill interesting and picked it up. I love being able to say "Get Dressed" while we are downstairs and he goes upstairs, picks out some clothes, and get dressed.
  
• Eye Contact - When this all started, Grant was completely unresponsive. I'd get right in his face and there would be no response (this was around 2.5 years). The ability to make eye contact is of course very hard for so many of our kids, and the "teaching" of eye contact varies widely. ABA is "look at me" 5000 times a day. RDI is getting him to find interest in your face so that he seeks eye contact. I definitely lean towards more the RDI approach, but more than anything, I think it's just been time and maturation which has brought him forward in this area.
  Tonight, Grant and I had a very tough time when he needed to take his supplements. After about 20 minutes, I sent him (sternly) to his room. He was upset and of course I was frustrated as well. A few minutes later, I went up to his room to try and explain the concept to him (again). As he sat in his bed, playing with a few character toys, he looked right at me with his eyes wide open, easily making contact for 7-10 seconds at a time. I talked to him, he looked at me. I talked some more, and then he leaned forward and gave me a hug. He looks at me to gather information, not because I tell him to. I think he's curious. I think he's puzzled. I think he's the most amazing kid.
  

I'm stunned when I look at this list. He has worked so hard, and he wants so hard to understand and to be understood. We will continue to work as hard on the new skills as we have on these, we'll continue to celebrate the victories, and the future will bring what it brings.