Back and forth

Even during this hard time after learning about my brother's passing, the lights in my life become ever so much brighter and clearer.

Tonight, while over at my in-laws for dinner, Grant brought me out to the swing set, as he often does. As I've written before, he LOVES to swing. The two of us have spent hundreds of hours with me pushing him on the swing and over the past 6+ years I have been trying to teach him how to swing himself. Legs out, Legs in. Back and forth. Watch me do it. Watch Cassidy do it. My hand on his leg, showing him how. In all that time, I never saw one time where he even began to do it on his own. He loves to swing, and he loves to have me push him. I think it's just been that simple.

But tonight - that changed. The crazy thing is, I'm crying as I write this and I wasn't during my previous post about my brother. Tonight, Grant brought me out to the swing. He sat down, pushed back with his feet and swung forward. At the apex of the swing, he swung his legs back and started to gain momentum. As he swung forward, he stretched his legs straight out and began swinging, back and forth, back and forth, all on his own. I stood there and cheered him on, my mouth gaping open. He continued, smiling and enjoying himself as if he's done this every day of his life.

On this day when I ponder how my brother could end his own future, I marvel at my son's growth and the great joy he will continue to bring into ours own future.